Decks of many things!

I have now two decks of cards available on DriveThruCards

The Fabulous Tiny Guild: 

A deck made with 130 characters I drew for my mini-zines.
http://www.drivethrucards.com/product/240185/The-Fabulous-Mini-Guild

If you want to print some tiny character sheets to go with the cards, you can find the PDF file there.

The Wizard's Inheritance:

A deck of 101 whimsical magical items made with the illustrations from the Wizard's Inheritance zine.
http://www.drivethrucards.com/product/240088/The-Wizards-Inheritance

Lavender Proto-Magister with sensorial jewelry

Proto-Magisters

HD: 2 by level of spell casting

AC: as slime

Save as wizard

Alignment: lavender-neutral

Att & dmg: 1, 1d6 of corroding damage. 

Spell casting:
proto-magister can cast mage spells. Each spell is a globe of protoplasm slime with 1HD by spell level. Casting spells cost the magister 1HP by spell level. Protoplasm spells lose 1hp by appropriate time unit after the spell duration end. Instant spell proptoplasm lose 1d4 hp by rounds. Magisters can heal protoplasm spells by transfering HP while touching them. Protoplasm spells have a AC as a non-armored being and can be attacked. Casting the same spell on a protoplasm heal for 1d6 HP by spell level.

Spell absorbing:
When a magister pass a saving throw and resist a spell effect it heal by 1hp by level of the spell.

Sensorial jewelry:
Grant normal sense to the magister, without them they can only orient themselves through sensing vibrations and always act last in initiative order.

Unidentified creature

I asked people on G+ what are these creatures and I compiled their answers.

• The march of the tuba tulips. Resist their dance if you can.
• Skyns- waiting to slip onto a host humanoid.
• They are Komaedians (I had a director who used to say that comedians are tubes : in those tubes you can put emotions to play true characters...) So, the komaedians are creatures who are feeding of emotions (fear, sadness, anger...). When they devore all the emotions of someone, they can take the shape of the victim and the victim falls totally apathetic. 
• Bugles(tm) golems.
• These gentile creatures are a vital part of the pond ecology in the desert of a thousand oases.
• Through their long, tubelike arms they draw water up from a pool, two or three draining one in under an hour. They consume befouling creatures and any dung that may have tainted the pool, and seed it with sand-fairies and fast-growing fern spores over the next day’s travels, and then deposit the purified and enlivened water in a different pond basin by burrowing into the bed and letting that waters rise out of their funnel-shaped “heads.” It’s estimated that nearly a third of the water in the desert is in transit at any given time. Harming them is taboo in the local culture, and and that are killed release a sudden flood and riotous growth. More than one adventuring party has been caught in the sudden deluge, nearly drowned, choked by fern-vines, and left bound to dry up in the desert as the water disappears into the sand. Rumors: sometimes they will burry themselves without releasing their full water load, and then turn an area suddenly to quicksand. We’re not sure what they do with those who can’t escape, but caerns of carefully (but not...accurately) arranges bones are sometimes found. Rumors: it is said that if the proper gift is given, and the proper song sung, one can be convinced to give out a small portion of healing water before completing its journey. How does it pour out this largeness? Rumors: it is said the Red Bandit made a sport of harassing the creatures, and once killed three in a week. For the next month, every watering hole they visited dried up as they were approaching, and many of his followers died of desert madness. 
• Man-eating plants or plant-eating humans.
• They are the Fallopians. They're mischievous sprites that use their charms to encourage romantic attraction, unplanned sex, and the failure of birth control mechanisms.
• Artery abhumans grown from cloned artery tissue long ago and gone wild
• Audiovores
• In the TNG episode where everyone gets addicted to the video games, those are the creatures in the video game. They are a form of non-biological life that subsists on eating the energy from those discs in the game.
• They are the Cacophonist's Stormtubas. After sound was created, the Cacophonist (who went by a different name then) could not leave well enough alone. The universe could emit more sounds! better sounds! Continuous sounds! And so it started to transform a resisting world. These days the Cacophonist is waging loud war, and the stormtubas are  its vanguard. They come blaring and bleating over the hills, their attack-polka striking fear in anyone but the tone deaf and the angels of Quiet, the Cacophonist's surest foes. 
• Before a Beholder fully matures, they gambol about in these meat-suit onesies 
• Parsnip Spirits :)
• Spiral walkers (Uzumaki!)  
• They are Lurth-opus, creatures from other dimensions that seek rational humanoids to wear as theis bodies. They will, after taking control of a body, feed from their nutrients and brain activity until they die, after that they will dispose of that flesh and seek another. If dealt with and correctly put on a stupor, but not killed, the creatures may become a powerful armor, that grants a brain damaging wave of power and some dimensional travel capabilities.
• Friends

Why the Shadow-Hands orcs are "evil".

I rolled a couple of times on the "Why these orcs are evil" random tables I previously posted.

This is the tale of the Shadow-Hands orcs. 

4000 years ago: a Dark Lord befriended and subjugated the people for his own dark goals.
But his half-orc daughter, Ulra Shadow-Fang defeated him and liberated the tribes.
Humans have their own version of this story and tell how the alliance of the five blades defeated the Dark Lord.

600 years ago: a long and disastrous civil war violently teared them apart. The Shadow-Fang bloodline desired to create a alliance with the Winter-Moon barbarians but human interference and propaganda caused the downfall of the heroic blood-line of Ulra.

400 year ago: scarcity of a key resource destroyed their new way of living. The surviving tribes became aurocs herders but a disease destroyed the great herds and the clans became mercenaries.

100 year ago: scarcity of a key resource destroyed their new way of living. The new Empire dispersed the great human-orc mercenaries warbands and the orcs military houses lost everything, most of them became bandits.

4 years ago: rise of a populist leader: a populist orc leader target the humans and blame everything on them to gain political momentum. His clan raise in power and is seen as a menace by the alliance of five blades.

3 month ago: break of treaty: the alliance of five blade broke the treaty that let orcs work in human cities.

3 days ago: border disputes and skirmishes. The declining Empire start moving troops in the orcs territories to reclaim one of their former states.

Why they are not always seen as evil? 

Some tribe members are know to work for humans (or to hire humans) and are appreciated for their competence. But since the break of the treaty they can't work in human cities anymore, this anger a lot of people on both side.

Outcasts from their tribe live with humans and adopted human culture. These are mostly descendants of the fallen Shadow-Fang bloodline.

Why it is complicated to deal with them?

They have a special character class that do something that seem repulsive. The Dark Hands still remember some of the rites of the Dark Lord. When becoming one, their hand blacken, wither and shrivel and grant them special necromantic powers.

They ritualise a specific activity and it take a longer time to do it. This is a remaining ritual from their herding days. To become the owner of a horse or to ride a new one, one must make a old ritual of bounding that take 1d6 days. The ritual give a advantage to any check made with that horse. Riding a horse without doing this ritual ensue severe reaction penalties.

Why these orcs are "evil"?

Recently there was some interesting discussions about evil monsters and I thought of writing some random tables that tell why a group of humanoids monsters are considered "evil" or more interestingly "enemies".

My goal is with these tables is to help make that tribe or orcs or bugbears you just rolled more interesting then just being "evil" or "chaotic". That said, a other solution can be to simply avoid using humanoids monsters and to use human factions instead.


What happened?
These tables assume that these monsters were simply "neutral" in the past and that something happened to constantly put them in harsh situations that lead to them becoming harsh and being considered evil by humans.

You can roll multiple times on each tables if you want to generate a harsher and more complex history.

The mystical past (d10) (These events happened a very long time ago, maybe 1d6 x 1000 years ago. Their stories focus on how their heroes have free their people from these hardships. There is also the possibility that the supernatural elements of these legends are interpretation of more mundane historical events)

1. Their greatest guide or champion was corrupted by a powerful magical item.
2. Their leaders were under the control of a supernatural influence (mind parasites, demons, etc).  
3.  A evil deity or demon took over their old religion and corrupted their priests.   
4.  A giant monster (dragon, giant, kraken, etc) ruled over them for many generations. 
5. A dark lord befriended or subjugated them for his or her own dark goals. 
6. A petty and vengeful deity cursed them for the "sin" of a important hero. 
7. A greedy or misguided leader made a dark pact with a dark deity and regretted it.  
8. They pursued a dangerous art or science that unleashed a disaster or a curse. 
9. They exploited a corrupted resource that slowly corrupted their bodies and their civilization. 
10. They were hunted or enslaved by a magic using civilization (elves, dwarfs, titans, immortals, etc) 

The distant past (d10) (These events happened at least a 1d6 x 100 years ago) (different factions may have different interpretations of these events) 

1. They were exiled and forced to settle in a harsh or hostile environment.  
2. They were allied with a human faction that lost a major war. 
3. Their land was colonized by a human faction that was considered a enemy. 
4. The great war happened over their territory and devastated their lands. 
5. A positive leader or champion was assassinated and this created a moral vacuum. 
6. A corrupt dynasty supported by a outside faction ruled over them for generation. 
7. A natural disaster or calamity destroyed the new city they were building. 
8. Scarcity of a key resource destroyed their new way of living and pushed them toward harsher work. 
9. A booming and ruthless economy followed by a crash destroyed ruined the new society they were building. 
10. A long and disastrous civil war violently teared them apart. The original conflict may be about allying themselves or not with a human faction.  

What recently happened to stir the anger? (d20) (The first event happened 1d6 years ago, the second one 1d6 months ago and the third one 1d6 days ago) 

1. Trespassing: a human faction is establishing a route through their territory.
2. Murder or hateful crime: a murder was committed on the tribe territory and accusations go both ways. (it could be a accident).  
3. Border dispute & skirmishes: local factions fight over the their territory.  
4. Land appropriation: a human faction claim ownership over their land and want to sell or exploit it. 
5. Population movement: the arrival of human refugees or settlers into their territory. 
6. Criminals: local criminals are hiding in the tribe territory. Humans accuse them of protecting them.  
7. Mercenaries: a mercenary band arrived in their territory to recruit new blood. Humans (and some of their own kind) fear their militarization. 
8. Rise of a biter leader: a biter and vengeful leader is rising in their ranks (or in a human faction targeting them). 
9. Scapegoating: someone have been wrongly accused of a crime or blamed for a accident. 
10. Rise of a populist leader: a populist leader target the other side and blame everything on them to gain political momentum. 
11. Corruption: a criminal or outside faction influence one of their clan or leader. 
12. Calamity: a natural disaster or plague devastate the land, blames go on both sides. 
13. Scarcity: a local resource is becoming rarer and force them to venture outside of their territory or human to venture into their territory.  
14. Succession war: a important clan leader died and the power vacuum risk to trigger a succession war. 
15. Bad trade: a trade with a human faction went very badly or was very exploitative. 
16. New predator: the arrival of a new monster push some of them toward human territories.
17. Harsh competition: the tribe and the human compete over a trade or the use of a resource or a location.  
18. Attacks: orcs or human travelers were attacked by unknown assaillants. 
19. Rumors: new rumors about the tribe or the humans circulate and generate fear. 
20. Break of treaty or pact: a pact or a treaty was not respected or broken (by necessity, accident or malice).

How they are not always seen as evil? (d20) (You can roll multiple times)  

1. They respect the quality of one of the six attributes (STR, DEX, CON, INT, WIS, CHA) (You may use this stat for reaction adjustments).
2. They master a craft and respect who master or respect it.  
3. They respect a common historical figure meaningful to a faction allied with the PCs. 
4. They respect the teachings of a old and still respected philosophy, religion, school, guild, army or faction.   
5. Some tribe members are know to work for humans (or to hire humans) and are appreciated for their competence. 
6. They like to trade goods and enjoy a good trade. 
7. The tribe have a mutual relationship with a faction allied with the humans. 
8. They always help strangers in a bad situation.   
9. Outcasts from their tribe live with humans and adopted human culture. 
10. They oppose a common enemy (for a relatable reason). 
11. They create and trade a unique resource.  
12. They have a good mentor of one of the PC class and respect members of the same class. 
13. They always show great hospitality and like to share food, drinks and laughters. 
14. They have beast companions that they respect and they show the same respect for other beast companions. 
15. They are very curious about the world and like to trade knowledge. 
16. They respect a old historical location set on their territory and respect history and who also respect it.  
17. They take great care of their sick and wounded.  
18. They show respect for their dead and to the land. 
19. They always honor a special greeting or sign that reference a historical alliance. 
20. They do everything as a family unit, children or elders are always present.  

How dealing with them can be complicated? (d20) (again you can roll multiple times)  

1. Their language is complex and hard to master and require skill rolls to avoid errors. 
2. They eat something strange and hard to digest (but delicious). 
3. They dislike a type of gear and look down on it use, they may use a alternate solution.  
4. Some members of their society have specific greeting or introduction habits that can be complicated to honor. 
5. They dislike a type of teachings or religion from the PC's culture.  
6. They dislike a historical figure or hero from the PC's culture. 
7. They dislike a type of creature allied or beneficial for the PC's.  
8. They dislike a type of spells or magic.  
9. They dislike a allied faction.  
10. They respect a enemy faction for their own reasons. 
11. They have beast companions that seem repulsive or dangerous. 
12. They have a special character class that do something that seem repulsive. Like fire bugs eaters who vomit fire. They can eventually offer to teach that class.  
13. They have a dangerous combat tradition that buy social currency. 
14. They dont eat or drink a type of food. 
15. They frown on the use of certain material for a specific function. Like gold can be good for sacred jewelry but they frown on it use for coins. 
16. They have a different version of a specific historical event.  
17. They don't trust a character class and it methods (but they could be actually good at it) 
18. They ritualise a specific activity and it take a longer time to do it. 
19. They do a specific activity only at a specific time, location or with a specific person. 
20. They respect and refuse to kill a specific monster (or type of monsters) that the PCs have to deal with. 

Orc baby generator

Roll a d4, d6, d8, d10 and d12 to complete the phrase:
You see a (d4) little thing with (d6), (d8) with (d10), [he/she] look at you and (d12).

You see a (d4) little thing

1. giggling  
2. crying 
3. sleepy 
4. hungry 

with (d6),

1. crusty eyes
2. large ears 
3. a running snout 
4. chubby arms 
5. a missing tooth
6. large fangs 

(d8)

1. playing 
2. eating 
3. hiding 
4. breaking things 
5. crawling 
6. running
7. hugging  
8. fighting 

with (d10)

1. a tired [rat/badger] 
2. a dirty [blanket/boot] 
3. a big [club/knife]
4. a old [bone/sword] 
5. a large [tooth/claw] 
6. a ball of [snots/dried dung]
7. a fat [centipede/grub] 
8. a blood soaked [doll/rattle]
9. a dented [shield/helm] 
10. [his/her] little snotty [brother/sister]

[he/she] look at you and (d12).

1. smile
2. blink
3. scream
4. yawn
5. belch 
6. laugh 
7. fall down 
8. growl 
9. wince
10. say "GRUG!" 
11. wave
12. point at your feet